Unprepared and Unable to Fight the Devil and Death!
In 2004, I was utterly and completely overcome by demons and evil spirits. It occurred after I had cried out from the depths of my soul to know the meaning of life. I grew up in Adelaide, South Australia. Met Leo, married, and later we moved to the Adelaide Hills and bought a property of 80 acres just outside a small town called Birdwood. It was where tragedy struck. I was unprepared, and my faith in God could not help me.
Emptiness Filled Me
I grew up as a Lutheran in a Lutheran home; my father was a Lutheran, and his father, a Lutheran Minister. At a young age, my parents and the church taught me that my infant baptism saved me. I went to confirmation classes, believing that when I died, God would take me to heaven. But I did not see any evidence of this truth – my parents were unloving and unkind, and I was unhappy and felt empty, and loneliness filled me.
I Married for Love and the Pursuit of Love in All Things
Leo and I met young when I was fifteen, and he was seventeen at a youth social dance for Lutherans. I married Leo eight years later, not for his career or status, but for his character and love for me. I had chosen to marry for love, not the pursuit of money and gain of possessions like I had seen my parents do. It had not made them happy and had caused me so much grief and unhappiness. Leo and I loved each other. I wanted love to fill my life and my marriage. For our Wedding Scripture, I chose 1 Corinthians 13:3-8, believing this truth – “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:3-8 NIV).
After Leo and I bought the property, I taught myself the guitar when pregnant with our third child. By this time, Leo had changed careers and was now the national and state specialist in his field as a mechanical engineer for the company he worked for. Leo was often away for weeks, sometimes months at a time, with only short bursts at home. “At least it’s something,” I told myself, wanting to sing my favorite artists’ songs. Since I was a child, I had longed to be a singer somehow. Even be in a band. But my shyness left me unable to pursue this dream. I was thirty-four years old, with this dream still buried in my heart, a calling God had given me that I did not understand. It was when songwriting began. And a friend told me I should enter a songwriting competition. I entered the Live category. I didn’t have any recording equipment. I had never sung into a microphone or been on stage. I couldn’t even sing in front of my husband! My heart pounded in the large hall at the music festival at Victor Harbor as people watched. I did not win a place in the competition. But afterward, a woman approached me. She liked my voice and encouraged me to come to a Songwriting Association Open Mic Session. It began my journey as a songwriter and performing artist in the music industry.
Hunted for My Desire to Know the Truth Using the Gifts God had Given Me
Five years later, I released my first solo CD, recording most of the songs in my home studio. I had taught myself the craft of recording after winning songwriting competitions and going into studios as part of the prize. I realized how expensive it was, so I taught myself the craft, and Leo helped me assemble a home studio. But the night of my CD release, I watched Leo at the bar talking to our friends as I performed and thought, “You are happy, but I am not.” Leo would leave at 4 am to catch the early bird flight to Melbourne. I knew I would be exhausted in the morning, tired after performing with the need to carry on without him, looking after our girls and the property and everything it entailed. “What have you achieved? My soul asked me as I played. “Nothing,” I said, “Nothing of importance!” I was aware that people probably would not remember my songs in the morning that I wrote from the depth of my soul and the loneliness I felt, and the struggles of striving so hard to have love when I knew I didn’t. I had married Leo for love, to share our life, and it felt like his work had taken my place.
The following night, I sat on my bed after caring for the girls with them finally in bed and thought, “I knew I would be exhausted!” It was just as I had predicted! “I can’t keep going on like this!” I told myself. It felt like, at any moment, I was going to break. But I did not have a choice; I had to keep going. So, I decided to end my singing/performing career to give myself more energy for what was happening in my marriage to Leo. The pain of that decision wrenched my heart – longing to sing for all those years and all the work I had done, knowing that I would never get another opportunity at thirty-nine! “There must be more to life than this!” I cried out. I had tried to live the 1 Corinthians 13 verses I had chosen for our marriage. But knew I did not have love. And now I had cried out to know why, and my faith in God would not be able to withstand the war that was to come against me to keep me from finding the answers and the truth.
I had one last show to perform, an obligation for a friend, and that’s where I met a man. He wanted to book me as a support artist for a well-known band in an impressive venue. He said he could help me and became my manager. But he was a liar and part of a satanic cult. The Devil had sent him to destroy me. And through trickery, witchcraft, hypnosis, and magic, he almost succeeded, and with the help of his friends, I became demon-possessed.
After trying everything to become free, I walked outside my house, looked up to the sky and to God in heaven, who I knew was good, and pleaded for life and for Him not to let me die in front of my children in such shame, filled with evil spirits. Leo was gone, and I was alone, fighting for my life and soul. But I knew I had failed and was about to die. Since childhood, I had wanted to worship Jesus but did not know how. Faith in Lutheranism and infant baptism had stopped the way and left me unprotected and vulnerable. I had no power to stop what had happened to me. But God answered my plea and cried to understand why I did not have love. God is love. And He sent His Son, Jesus, to this earth to break the spell of death and trickery against us that the Devil holds—and died on the cross to forgive our sins and give us a new life by believing in Him and listening and following what He says.
After all my efforts, I had trickery, deceit, and injustice. And after I cried out to God for life, Jesus did many miracles for me and personally taught me the gospel, the true message of Salvation, as He did in the Bible. I am a born-again child of God, no longer in darkness or trickery but serving the Lord Jesus with the gifts and talents He has given me.
A Changed, Redeemed Life Serving Jesus Christ as Lord
Twenty years later, I am just as passionate as the day Jesus showed me that He had died on the cross and that believing in Him and what He did disarms the spiritual forces of wickedness around us – the Devil and his angels that are demons and evil spirits. In 2008, Jesus asked Leo and me to sell our property and move to the United States and San Diego. Leo attended a school of ministry for four years as he continues to work as a mechanical engineer for the same company he did in Australia, but now in the United States. I have been writing my testimony book, leading worship, and continuing to write and record songs of praise for the Lord Jesus Christ in my studio. In June 2015, Leo and I went to Haiti to lead a marriage conference. In 2017, we returned to lead men and women conferences. We repeatedly returned to Soroti, Uganda, with Leo teaching in a school of ministry and me leading worship, where I also led women’s conferences and taught books of the Bible.
I was unprepared for the demonic attack that came against me. The Devil did not bother with me before I cried out to know the truth and the meaning of life because he knew that my Lutheran beliefs did not save me. I may have considered myself a Christian, believing my infant baptism saved me. But when that faith was tested, I had no power to stand or survive without Jesus teaching me the gospel of truth. I hope this brief testimony has encouraged you to believe in Jesus Christ. To know the Scriptures and ensure you have the proper knowledge of Salvation. Only when I listened to Jesus and did what He said I was delivered and set free.
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